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Some things that have been on my mind
May. 27th, 2006 04:57 pmThere's another reason that I don't tend to say much.
I've noticed that words can have an effect on people. You can brighten someone's day with just a brief compliment, or destroy a friendship with a single, thoughtless comment.
Not too long ago, I advised Michael that it was a good idea to plan out in advance when you speak, so you know exactly what to say and you don't say anything stupid. Now I realize how idiotic that advice is. You can't keep yourself from being an idiot by just thinking, as paradoxical as that may sound.
The thing of it is, the human mind is inherently flawed. Words reflect those flaws. But they're bent mirrors-- they usually magnify those flaws, or make them seem small and unimportant. The latter sort comes from people who have truly mastered the art. But the fact remains, every scratch and dent in a person will show in their words in some way.
Our words faithfully reflect us.
So, what do my words reflect?
That's what I fear. Many times, you'll reflect something you don't want to. And those reflections can hurt people.
Why would I want to use something that can hurt people I care about? Why would I want to wield the blade that cuts where I don't want it to?
That, I suppose, is one of the main reasons I'm silent. My words are stronger than I am. And I fear that strength.
But as vagrant as my words can be, I'm still responsible for them. So when they hurt someone, I have to own up to it and repent.
That, I suppose, is the main purpose of this. I don't like to hurt people. I don't like to make them feel bad. Am I weak? Yes. Am I a coward? Definitely. But I'm no villian.
So, I'm sorry. I'm an idiot. I feel terrible for being the pathetic, stupid idiot that I am. But don't let my stupidity bring you down.
That's all. Please don't hate me.
I've noticed that words can have an effect on people. You can brighten someone's day with just a brief compliment, or destroy a friendship with a single, thoughtless comment.
Not too long ago, I advised Michael that it was a good idea to plan out in advance when you speak, so you know exactly what to say and you don't say anything stupid. Now I realize how idiotic that advice is. You can't keep yourself from being an idiot by just thinking, as paradoxical as that may sound.
The thing of it is, the human mind is inherently flawed. Words reflect those flaws. But they're bent mirrors-- they usually magnify those flaws, or make them seem small and unimportant. The latter sort comes from people who have truly mastered the art. But the fact remains, every scratch and dent in a person will show in their words in some way.
Our words faithfully reflect us.
So, what do my words reflect?
That's what I fear. Many times, you'll reflect something you don't want to. And those reflections can hurt people.
Why would I want to use something that can hurt people I care about? Why would I want to wield the blade that cuts where I don't want it to?
That, I suppose, is one of the main reasons I'm silent. My words are stronger than I am. And I fear that strength.
But as vagrant as my words can be, I'm still responsible for them. So when they hurt someone, I have to own up to it and repent.
That, I suppose, is the main purpose of this. I don't like to hurt people. I don't like to make them feel bad. Am I weak? Yes. Am I a coward? Definitely. But I'm no villian.
So, I'm sorry. I'm an idiot. I feel terrible for being the pathetic, stupid idiot that I am. But don't let my stupidity bring you down.
That's all. Please don't hate me.
